There are a lot of bad therapists out there. Doctors too.
I've been mildly depressed/GAD lately (love that GAD), and I've been trying to find a primary care provider, therapist, psychiatrist, anybody who might be able to help. So far I've seen at least one of each, and each experience has been abysmal.
I accept the possibility that I might be a bit of a Negative Nancy. I realize I have high standards because 1) I'm fairly educated and can smell poor quality of care from miles away and 2) I have issues. But mostly 1). Yes?
My PCP barely let me get a word in. She literally made me take some lung test I'd never seen before (after I said, "I don't really want to do that," she stuck a plastic tube full of albuterol in my mouth). She made racial generalizations, and her full assessment was, "Well, you look good!"
After I told a psychiatrist that I was a therapist, she proceeded to explain in five-year-old terms what antidepressants are. "You see, they change the chemicals in your brain just a bit to help you feel better." Then she asked me three or four times how long ago I had panic attacks.
My favorite was a social worker I saw tonight who talked about himself half the time, topping it off with a 10-minute plug for his church. By the end I just said, "Yeah, I don't think we're a good fit. I'm gonna go now."
How hard can it be to find help that fits me? By now I'll settle for the basics: someone who listens and reflects, doesn't look utterly bewildered, validates, acts like s/he knows something about best practices, doesn't ask me rhetorical questions (Like, "So, have you worked out all that dad stuff?") or say things like, "See, the thing about Latina women is..."
I can say this: it motivates me to try and be the best clinician I can be. It's not about whether people want help; it's whether they can get it.
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5 comments:
F'real. My counselor has a copy of Motivational Interviewing in his bookshelf and clearly uses it. He listens, responds well, challenges me and lets me work through stuff, and helps me when I get stuck. Sounds like I got lucky.
I hear ya sister. I got stuck w GAD's cousin, SAD. I had a PCP one time who checked my thyroid because she thought I was 'too emotional' Then a therapist who referred me to long-term psychotherapy, but then never actually referred me. hmmm. I found that Guatemala and hammocks seem to be the trick! Take care.
I totally know what you mean.
What I don't know is what GAD and PCP means (or at least I thought it was some kind of hardcore drug, but knowing you I know its not the same PCP we're talking about...)
I hope you have better luck! you will find the therapist you deserve! (and yes, its mostly reason 1)
You all are the best!! Dave, I am so jealous!! I saw a therapist yesterday that I liked a lot better, but if it doesn't work out with him I might do therapy vicariously through you.
LOL sorry Patoja Calocha, GAD is Generalized Anxiety Disorder (a favorite among my fellow social workers--we all used to say "My GAD is acting up today"). PCP is Primary Care Provider (much less glamorous than the hallucinogen).
Adriana, I'm so glad to hear the hammocks have been cured you!! I think hammocks really are the answer to a lot of things.
girl! this is intense. if you need any recs lemme know!
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